NARRATOR: Last time on Rants of Valakut:
Christmas, Sci-Fi Movies, Superhero MoviesAnimated Shows #In5Cards.
And now, the conclusion….

Exterior. The Enterprise is approaching a star system with five planets and a single sun. The planets are each a different colour: a sandy yellow, an ocean blue, a dark purple, a deep scarlet and a forest green.

PICARD: (Voiceover) Captain’s log, stardate 47995. Starbase 23 has received a cryptic transmission originating from the Valakut sector. The Enterprise has been sent to investigate its source. I am meeting with my senior staff to discuss the situation.

Conference room. All senior staff are present. Data is giving a presentation.

DATA: The transmission appears to be a collection of puzzles.

RIKER: Puzzles?

DATA: Yes sir. One hundred and sixty-eight of them to be exact. Each one is comprised of five distinct trading cards that were used as part of Magic: the Gathering, a game popularized in the late twentieth century. The names of the five cards are arranged so as to create a narrative. For instance, if I were to say:

Midnight Haunting
Crown of Suspicion
Decision Paralysis
Telemin Performance
Compelled Duel

The answer would be “Hamlet.”

RIKER: So Midnight Haunting is the ghost at the beginning of the play, and Crown of Suspicion is Hamlet thinking that Claudius killed his father?

DATA: Yes.

TROI: That would make Decision Paralysis Hamlet’s general uncertainty about what to do, and the “to be or not to be” soliloquy.

CRUSHER: And Telemin Performance must be the play used to trick Claudius, while Compelled Duel is the fight between Hamlet and Laertes.

DATA: Precisely.

PICARD: Do we know what sort of narrative the puzzles in the transmission tell?

GEORDI: According to our analysis, they look like they’re describing our own ship’s logs. Each one’s a different mission, going all the way back to our encounter at Farpoint Station, seven years ago.

RIKER: Why would someone send us our own logs? What’s the point?

WORF: The transmission could be meant as a diversion. To distract us and weaken our defenses.

TROI: Or it could just as easily be an attempt to communicate. There’s no way to know for sure.

PICARD: Mm. I’m inclined to agree with the counselor; I’m not convinced this is an attack. Nevertheless, we should be prepared for that eventuality. Mr. Worf, keep monitoring the anomaly and inform us of any changes.

WORF: Aye, sir.

PICARD: And until we hear otherwise, I suggest we have a little fun with these puzzles. Mr. Data, I would like you to share the complete transmission with the rest of the crew. See if anyone can provide insight into why our ship’s logs would be sent back to us in this manner. If we can figure that out, perhaps we can get some answers.

DATA: Aye sir.

PICARD: Very well. That will be all. Dismissed.


 

Star Trek: The Next Generation #In5Cards

(List of episodes)

 

1.

Instill Energy
Swell of Growth
Planar Birth
Cycle of Life
Cradle to Grave




2.

Teleport
Phantasmal Form
Traumatic Visions
Psychosis Crawler
Lingering Souls




3.

King’s Assassin
Poison the Cup
Order of Succession
Roar of Challenge
Slayer of the Wicked




4.

Survey the Wreckage
Venser’s Journal
Corrupted Grafstone
An-Zerrin Ruins
Mystic Gate




5.

Hedron Archive
Matter Reshaper
Jungle Shrine
Myth Unbound
Wheel of Sun and Moon




6.

Infantry Veteran
Hatred
Rogue Skycaptain
Warcry Phoenix
Blunt the Assault




7.

Incendiary Sabotage
Dark Suspicions
Trial of Zeal
Witch Hunt
Zealous Persecution




8.

Youthful Scholar
Trial of Solidarity
Wrap in Flames
Lapse of Certainty
Stymied Hopes




9.

Death’s Shadow
Dregs of Sorrow
Haunting Apparition
Candlelight Vigil
Honor the Fallen




10.

Magus of the Vineyard
Quiet Contemplation
Burden of Guilt
Mudbrawler Cohort
Reborn Hope




11.

Mine Excavation
Gorgon’s Head
Temporal Trespass
Syphon Life
Fated Return




12.

Brink of Disaster
Frozen Solid
Power Surge
Breach
Rewind




13.

Clever Impersonator
Inspiring Captain
Deadlock Trap
Talisman of Hierarchy
Act of Authority




14.

Chariot of the Sun
Goblin Test Pilot
Perilous Research
Profaner of the Dead
Rise from the Grave




15.

Blood Feud
Rathi Assassin
Ageless Entity
Grudge Keeper
Touch of Death




16.

Fugitive Wizard
Military Intelligence
Kjeldoran Outpost
Disinformation Campaign
Barren Moor




17.

Isolated Watchtower
Unexplained Disappearance
Monstrous Hound
Miming Slime
Supplant Form




18.

Stasis Cocoon
Enchanted Being
Alluring Siren
Chimeric Idol
Selective Adaptation




19.

Caged Sun
Gravity Sphere
Miracle Worker
Open into Wonder
Doorkeeper




20.

Altered Ego
Telepathic Spies
Impostor of the Sixth Pride
Agent of Treachery
Marchesa’s Smuggler




21.

Musician
Piper’s Melody
Firestorm
Harm’s Way
Feeling of Dread




22.

Living Plane
Xantid Swarm
Wall of Souls
Drag Under
Diversionary Tactics




23.

Hive Mind
Forced Adaptation
Leadership Vacuum
Epic Confrontation
Battle for Bretagard




24.

Thought Courier
Dance of the Manse
Followed Footsteps
Bond of Passion
Pledge of Unity




25.

Blast Zone
Village Elder
Unyielding Krumar
Vodalian Illusionist
Penance




26.

The Elderspell
Withering Hex
Rapid Decay
Hair-Strung Koto
Pattern of Rebirth




27.

Mind Sludge
Vampiric Link
Profane Transfusion
Unburden
Abrupt Decay




28.

Take into Custody
Mana Chains
Spirit Link
Telekinetic Bonds
Narrow Escape




29.

Temporal Eddy
Vortex Elemental
Body Double
Kill Shot
Self-Inflicted Wound



Answer
Time Squared


30.

False Demise
Steal Artifact
Prized Unicorn
Pelt Collector
Treasure Trove




31.

Fell Flagship
Temporal Aperture
Reality Ripple
Faces of the Past
Crux of Fate




32.

Spoils of Victory
Quickchange
Reality Shift
Behold the Multiverse
Infinite Reflection




33.

Time Spiral
Runic Repetition
Déjà Vu
Three Tragedies
Avoid Fate




34.

Ichor Slick
Mephitic Ooze
Wasteland Strangler
Drown in Filth
Funeral Rites




35.

Loxodon Peacekeeper
Gut Shot
Symbiotic Wurm
Fleshgrafter
Creature Bond




36.

Caregiver
Disruptive Student
Spreading Flames
Uncage the Menagerie
Welcome to the Fold




37.

 

Feebleness
Junktroller
Implement of Improvement
Chief Engineer
Change of Heart




38.

Beseech the Queen
Desperate Castaways
Chandra’s Revolution
Heretic’s Punishment
Banishment Decree




39.

Mogg Assassin
Dauntless Bodyguard
Doom Foretold
Warriors’ Lesson
Stitch in Time




40.

Wall of Limbs
Forgotten Lore
Evil Twin
Eyetwitch
Crystalline Giant




41.

Extravagant Spirit
Rebuking Ceremony
Strip Bare
Naked Singularity
Mudhole




42.

Young Wei Recruits
Provoke
Make a Stand
Valor of the Worthy
Ashes of the Fallen




43.

Research Assistant
Weathered Wayfarer
Uncanny Speed
Far Wanderings
Edge of the Divinity




44.

 

Secret Salvage
Mark of Mutiny
Devious Cover-Up
Forbidden Ritual
Spectral Cloak




45.

Hampering Snare
Wound Reflection
Disempower
Subtle Strike
Maze Glider




46.

Taste of Paradise
Daring Archaeologist
Excavation
Dragonloft Idol
Relic Crush




47.

Swat
Confront the Unknown
The Raven’s Warning
Delif’s Cube
Relentless Advance




48.

Chain Lightning
Triplicate Spirits
Sinister Possession
Hostage Taker
Ghostly Prison




49.

 

Drawn from Dreams
Prison Barricade
Concealed Courtyard
Survivors’ Bond
Descendants’ Path




50.

Hazardous Conditions
Gitaxian Probe
Peer Through Depths
Unexplained Vision
Cloud Elemental




51.

District Guide
Ulrich’s Kindred
Forerunner of the Coalition
Intruder Alarm
Grave Betrayal




52.

Coma Veil
Sands of Time
Child of Night
Truth or Tale
Sway of Illusion




53.

Temporal Adept
False Prophet
Treasure Nabber
Trinket Mage
Curio Vendor




54.

Thespian’s Stage
Struggle for Sanity
Mindcrank
Deny Reality
Wrack with Madness




55.

Flame Sweep
Jandor’s Saddlebags
Thieves’ Fortune
Ambush Party
One with Nothing




56.

 

Golem Foundry
Lifesmith
Dovin’s Automaton
Thought Collapse
Deconstruct




57.

Cultural Exchange
Benalish Commander
Kargan Intimidator
Steadfastness
Due Respect




58.

Tin Street Market
Explosive Apparatus
Battlefield Medic
Press into Service
Vigilant Martyr




59.

Insolent Neonate
Rebel Informer
Ally Encampment
Admiral’s Order
Empty City Ruse




60.

Resurrection
Living Destiny
Clone
Leap of Faith
Call for Unity




61.

Sarulf’s Packmate
Ravages of War
Malevolent Awakening
Violent Outburst
Sword-Point Diplomacy




62.

Stab Wound
Warped Physique
Revelation
Mask of the Mimic
Not of This World




63.

 

Pride of the Perfect
Strength of Isolation
Airborne Aid
New Perspectives
Spiritual Asylum




64.

Lingering Death
Psychic Miasma
Skeletal Scrying
Ghastly Remains
Recross the Paths




65.

Mons’s Goblin Raiders
Hijack
Incorrigible Youths
Run Wild
Repel Intruders




66.

Neck Snap
Kitsune Bonesetter
Experiment One
Spinal Graft
Miraculous Recovery




67.

 

Experimental Overload
Dimensional Breach
Temporal Cascade
Shattered Perception
Reality Strobe




68.

Living Airship
Maddening Cacophony
Guardian of Solitude
Bond of Agony
Psychic Symbiont




69.

Killing Wave
Parallectric Feedback
Fervent Denial
Guilty Conscience
Metallic Mimic




70.

Giant Slug
Stomper Cub
Mana Leech
Power Taint
Foul-Tongue Invocation




71.

Diligent Farmhand
Clone Legion
Shape Stealer
Rally the Peasants
Band Together




72.

Logic Knot
Venerated Teacher
Humble Defector
Caves of Koilos
Harald Unites the Elves




73.

Tectonic Instability
Terashi’s Cry
Answered Prayers
Aid from the Cowl
Shred Memory




74.

Smuggler Captain
Deception
Quest for the Holy Relic
Thran Weaponry
Rage Reflection




75.

Vedalken Engineer
Illusions of Grandeur
Mirror Mockery
Mana Leak
Contamination




76.

Devastating Dreams
Bake into a Pie
Vile Consumption
Cleansing Screech
Miner’s Bane




77.

Blast of Genius
Weldfast Engineer
Impatience
Mind’s Dilation
One with the Machine




78.

Plummet
Trapped in the Tower
Scale the Heights
Birthing Hulk
Fangren Firstborn




79.

Metamorphic Alteration
Skinshifter
Chameleon Blur
Neoform
Parasitic Impetus




80.

Old Man of the Sea
Fountain of Youth
Scars of the Veteran
Reviving Dose
Die Young




81.

Duelist’s Heritage
Run Afoul
Scarscale Ritual
Test of Endurance
Talon of Pain




82.

Fight to the Death
Vulshok Gauntlets
Quillspike
Coat with Venom
Revive the Fallen




83.

Academy Elite
Nova Chaser
Acrobatic Maneuver
Sudden Impact
Grave Consequences




84.

Warrior’s Honor
Traitorous Blood
The Bloodsky Massacre
Disciple of Deceit
Excommunicate




85.

Abandoned Sarcophagus
Cold Storage
Wake the Dead
Border Patrol
Foreboding Ruins




86.

God-Favored General
Grim Contest
Gift of Immortality
Boon of the Wish-Giver
Deny the Divine




87.

Mother of Runes
Pattern Matcher
Blink of an Eye
Mask of Memory
Neurok Replica




88.

Amnesia
Argent Mutation
Healing Hands
Blessed Light
Angelic Ascension




89.

Attended Healer
Soul Link
Thalakos Dreamsower
Plaguebearer
Fated Infatuation




90.

Phantasmal Fiend
Dubious Challenge
Runed Arch
Write into Being
Brilliant Ultimatum




91.

Resistance Fighter
Contested War Zone
Audacious Infiltrator
Act of Treason
Join the Ranks




92.

Kashi-Tribe Warriors
Thoughtweft Trio
Glorious End
Deathgreeter
Resounding Roar




93.

 

Wake of Destruction
Crystal Quarry
Campaign of Vengeance
Strionic Resonator
Shatter




94.

Lightning Storm
Gaze of Pain
Debilitating Injury
Unlikely Alliance
Rescue from the Underworld




95.

Unexpectedly Absent
String of Disappearances
Bubble Snare
Last One Standing
Planar Collapse




96.

Trial of Knowledge
Cast Through Time
Seasons Past
Once and Future
Shell Shield




97.

 

Psychogenic Probe
Memory Jar
Life’s Legacy
History of Benalia
Citanul Flute




98.

Grasp of Darkness
Morbid Curiosity
Twisted Experiment
Boiling Blood
Death Denied




99.

Goblins of the Flarg
Mana Drain
Temporary Truce
Lash of the Whip
Awaken the Ancient




100.

Fall from Favor
Bonds of Mortality
Near-Death Experience
Selfless Spirit
Second Chance




101.

Sylvan Paradise
Carpet of Flowers
Tragic Slip
Crush Underfoot
Public Execution




102.

Proud Wildbonder
Savage Silhouette
Kindred Discovery
Stubborn Denial
Devotee of Strength




103.

Bring to Trial
Harsh Judgment
Glowing Anemone
Celestial Ancient
Release to the Wind




104.

Aether Tunnel
Shrewd Negotiation
Unstable Frontier
Ruinous Path
Reroute




105.

Words of Wind
Increasing Confusion
Tales of the Ancestors
Myth Realized
Dagger of the Worthy




106.

Crash Landing
Sunscorched Desert
Dehydration
Fountain Watch
Part the Waterveil




107.

Generous Gift
Vessel of Endless Rest
Splitting Headache
Chain to Memory
Squee’s Revenge




108.

Apprentice Wizard
Angelic Destiny
Untamed Might
Succumb to Temptation
Invoke the Divine




109.

Banish into Fable
Norwood Archers
Outlaws’ Merriment
Swashbuckling
Valiant Rescuer




110.

Corridor Monitor
Errant Doomsayers
Warped Landscape
Distorting Wake
Aether Rift




111.

Bloodtallow Candle
Ghostly Touch
Woodland Cemetery
Stir the Grave
Haunted Dead




112.

Trade Caravan
Medicine Runner
Serum Tank
Endemic Plague
Tainted Remedy




113.

Audacious Thief
Coveted Jewel
Arrester’s Admonition
Secret Plans
Run Away Together




114.

Sacred Ground
Spiritual Visit
Advice from the Fae
Traveler’s Cloak
Broken Bond




115.

Stormcloud Spirit
Artifact Possession
Mind Harness
Captain of the Mists
Signal Pest




116.

Command Beacon
Dutiful Return
Golem Artisan
Shared Summons
Steelshaper’s Gift




117.

Beloved Princess
Protector of the Crown
Beast Within
Grisly Transformation
Aspect of Wolf




118.

Gravity Well
Ice Over
Infectious Bloodlust
Broken Concentration
Frenzied Fugue




119.

Thorn of Amethyst
Venomous Vines
Sustaining Spirit
Invoke the Firemind
Memory’s Journey




120.

Lurking Nightstalker
Transgress the Mind
Memory Plunder
Psychic Intrusion
Unnerving Assault




121.

Recurring Nightmare
Floating-Dream Zubera
Call of the Full Moon
Emissary of the Sleepless
Catalyst Elemental




122.

Children of Korlis
Cateran Kidnappers
Custody Battle
Spirit of Resistance
Irradiate




123.

Ogre Jailbreaker
Infantry Veteran
Engineered Might
Cabal Conditioning
Righteous Indignation




124.

Stealth Mission
Captured by the Consulate
Torture Chamber
Dazzling Lights
Coerced Confession




125.

Brainwash
Sleeper Agent
Seer’s Vision
Profane Command
Assassin’s Strike




126.

Scheming Symmetry
Tandem Lookout
Paired Tactician
Twincast
Synchronized Spellcraft




127.

Bog Wreckage
Salvage Drone
Contentious Plan
Mind Bomb
Return to the Ranks




128.

Vedalken Mastermind
Spiteful Returned
Illusionist’s Stratagem
Wall of Deceit
Turn the Tables




129.

Icatian Town
Rite of Replication
Spitting Image
Gideon’s Lawkeeper
Fateful Showdown




130.

Unhallowed Pact
Infernal Contract
Reaper from the Abyss
Temple of Deceit
Illusory Demon




131.

Unfulfilled Desires
Dogged Pursuit
Forceful Denial
Talent of the Telepath
Expose Evil




132.

Fatal Blow
Alter Reality
Lost Legacy
Bold Impaler
Curse of the Pierced Heart




133.

Body of Jukai
Natural Affinity
Pariah
Crush Dissent
Neutralize




134.

Weight of Memory
Mental Agony
Drowned Secrets
Childhood Horror
Suffer the Past




135.

Terraformer
Zagoth Crystal
Fleshbag Marauder
Light from Within
Ardent Plea




136.

Transmutation
Essence of the Wild
Feral Instinct
Arachnoform
Primal Huntbeast




137.

Earnest Fellowship
Coldsteel Heart
Practiced Tactics
Last Kiss
Erase




138.

Goblin Chieftain
Claim the Firstborn
Sadistic Obsession
Take Vengeance
Eye for an Eye




139.

Accumulated Knowledge
Magus of the Mind
Dying Wish
Body Snatcher
Epitaph Golem




140.

Extinction Event
Village Survivors
Zoetic Cavern
Illusionary Terrain
Migration Path




141.

Insidious Will
Infiltrator’s Magemark
Bond Beetle
Invader Parasite
Ichor Explosion




142.

Erratic Explosion
Reflecting Mirror
Murder Investigation
Show and Tell
Fact or Fiction




143.

Emperor’s Vanguard
Minamo’s Meddling
Security Blockade
Magnetic Web
Entrapment Maneuver




144.

Initiate’s Companion
Fertile Imagination
Ethereal Guidance
Inner-Chamber Guard
Keep Safe




145.

Abandoned Outpost
Dack’s Duplicate
Beamsplitter Mage
Splinter Twin
Clash of Wills




146.

Allied Strategies
Unconventional Tactics
Unexpected Results
Game Plan
Standstill




147.

Mishra’s Self-Replicator
So Tiny
Lifecraft Awakening
Wipe Away
Backlash




148.

Door to Nothingness
No Escape
Read the Bones
Gamble
Endbringer




149.

Afterlife
Death’s Duet
Ghostform
Passwall Adept
Haunted Cloak




150.

Ruinous Ultimatum
Merciless Eviction
Holdout Settlement
Swift Reckoning
Delay




151.

Collective Unconscious
Discontinuity
Trail of Mystery
Hidden Ancients
Destroy the Evidence




152.

Illusionary Wall
Silent Observer
Glimpse the Sun God
Leaf Arrow
Human Frailty




153.

Train of Thought
Pieces of the Puzzle
Glyph of Life
Summoning Station
Beacon of Creation




154.

Accomplished Automaton
Rule of Law
Court Homunculus
Soul’s Grace
Deem Worthy




155.

Quicksilver Fountain
Adaptive Automaton
Toolcraft Exemplar
Trigon of Thought
Circle of Protection: Artifacts




156.

Argivian Archaeologist
Tablet of the Guilds
Path of Ancestry
Scatter the Seeds
Common Bond




157.

Abduction
Altar of Shadows
Hidden Horror
Clickslither
Riptide Laboratory




158.

Argothian Elder
Life’s Finale
Deathreap Ritual
Mortal’s Resolve
Suicidal Charge




159.

Grip of Amnesia
Selective Memory
Mission Briefing
False Orders
Victorious Destruction




160.

An-Havva Township
Quag Sickness
Folk Medicine
Poison the Well
Vindictive Mob




161.

Into the Story
Thraben Inspector
Illusionary Informant
Precinct Captain
Malfunction




162.

Goblin Recruiter
Depths of Desire
Telepathy
Trickery Charm
Impassioned Orator




163.

Helm of Obedience
Meditation Puzzle
Calming Verse
Psychic Trance
Flash of Defiance




164.

Arms Dealer
Display of Dominance
Slaughter Drone
Arcane Adaptation
Increasing Savagery




165.

Silent Arbiter
Chorus of Woe
Lash Out
Sudden Death
Interpret the Signs




166.

Forced Landing
Lay Bare the Heart
Disrupt Decorum